Thursday, February 7, 2008

A Good Night's Sleep

Dino and I tried out the new mattress last night and the night before. I bought a spring mattress from IKEA with a frame, but I am waiting to put the frame together until I move out. The mattress is waaaaay comfy and is perfectly firm. The pillows I got on sale at Kohl's are a bit too poufy for me, I think. Still, Dino and I got a good night's sleep and I am liking my purchase.

I don't think I mentioned it, but I did talk to Mr. HKG on Saturday about the divorce. I wanted to be sure he understood where Dino's behavior was coming from when he needed to be corrected. He sympathized and stated that he would let me know if Dino acts out or has issues in class. Last night, Dino was his normal goofy self, but at least this time he didn't get into "trouble". Instead, it seemed Mr. HKG took Dino aside and worked with him one on one. I have to say, I am really impressed with the instructor for doing this. He really cares about his students and works to get them where they need to be. He didn't tell me Dino acted out, but Dino did. Too funny how honest Dino can be! He gets props for that.

Speaking of funny - Dino was falling asleep last night and made a strange comment. "Mommy, pee is stronger than water and it could soak through the pad on the bed, right? So I shouldn't wet the bed." Har! Maybe getting the new bed was good for more than just sleeping in comfort and peace :) If it can help Dino from wetting the bed, even better!

T is still being crass and lewd with comments to me. At least now he is keeping Dino out of earshot when he makes these comments. I am learning to let it go and just let him sink into whatever pit of sludge he feels necessary. His behavior is only reinforcing the fact that I am doing the right thing here.

Also last night, T shared with me the "standard custody agreement" that the lawyer must have given him. It is pretty basic, and T stated that when it came to Dino, he was not going to argue any points. We discussed the visitation schedule, and I stated that I felt that as long as he was civil, we would have no problems with the agreement. We talked about summer camp and getting Dino coverage for spring break. We also talked about what Dino would need for the summer and how he would get to any camps we discussed. A little worry of mine was getting Dino to camp when I had to be at work early. He stated that he could drop him off at any point as well, and that we didn't have to argue on those points.

He also asked for my W2 to calculate the support payments. I told him I would give it to him if he shared his with me. He did. I copied both and jumped right on the calculator that is available online with the Family Courts website. Factoring in tuition, the amount he has to pay came to about $1,072.00. If I don't factor in tuition (since we agreed to have that as a separate part of the agreement), it becomes $849.00. If the amount is lower than that on the settlement papers, I will not sign. Also, T is meeting with the lawyer today to draw up the papers. I am waiting for the "surprise" that he threatened me with. He claims it doesn't have anything to do with Dino or money, but I don't believe him. I have already left messages at a couple of different lawyer's offices. One is not accepting new clients until March. The others have not yet returned my calls. I know I need to get one, so I am pursuing this agressively.

Finally, I will be filing for temporary custody after all. I was waiting for the papers, but I know that I can't trust T, so I am making sure he isn't going to pull a fast one and try to get full custody of Dino. That is my biggest fear. I am kicking myself that I had not done this already. Pray that this piece goes in my favor, because fear is ripping me apart at this point.

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