Wednesday, March 25, 2009

When Dreams and Reality Collide

Ok, so I lost 6 pounds this week. Not too shabby. Then suddenly it seemed like it all came unraveled. I can't stand it. What is WRONG with me? Why do I sabotage myself?

Anyway, been having some REALLY strange dreams lately. Like Vince Vaughn trying to steal me away from J - and I don't even LIKE Vince Vaughn. Or like finding a chocolate lab in my bedroom and trying to hide it from the neighbors (don't ask why, I have no idea). Or the one where I am competing in a bathing suit competition (and I'm thin, yay!) but the judges can see my stretch marks and I get horrible comments. Or even better yet, the one where I am in this house and a twister picks me up and drops me.....oh, never mind. That was a movie.

Random thought - Zac Efron. Cute or not? Discuss.

Ok, so back to the dreams. No, I am not drinking before bed. And no, I am not eating before bed. I don't know where they are coming from, really.

The Vince Vaughn one really had me scratching my head. I really don't find this guy all that attractive or funny, so why would I dream of him? Don't know. Never even saw him in a movie that I can remember. What's even funnier is that I totally ignore him in the dream and he sends me flowers and gifts and J and I laugh and keep on going our merry way.

For the dog dream, there is suddenly a new law that you can only have one pet per house. I already have 3 cats in the dream and the dog suddenly appears in my bedroom. I am struggling to keep him in the house during the day and sneaking him out to the yard at night. I have to have all the lights out and the backyard light disconnected. I keep hoping the poor thing doesn't bark or make any noises.

Then, for the swim suit one, I am forced to wear a bikini, though I know that other girls are wearing a full suit. I try to cover my stretch marks with makeup, but it's no use. I still look pretty darn good in my black bikini and matching black stilettos (well, better than I do NOW) but I can hear the judges announcing to the audience each thing they find wrong with the women on the stage. As I walk across, I hear them say, "Tsk, Tsk, it's a shame she has such ugly marks on her stomach and legs" and "She should really just excuse herself from competition"....I leave the stage with a smile, but inside I am dying.

So, what does all this mean? I have no idea. Anyone care to take a stab at these?


Adorable Girlfriend said...

Do you read before you go to bed?

All I got is Three's Company collides with Little Miss Sunshine.

grandmamargie said...

When I read that you found a chocolate lab in your bedroom, I was thinking "a candy making business", not a dog. How funny.